if my heart has one ambition.

I have been in a spiritual rut for quite some time now.  Back in the fall, I craved prayer time.  I couldn’t get enough of my Bible and quiet time with God.  Now, a few months later, I can barely motivate myself to do any of these things.   It’s not necessarily a bad thing;  I am aware that basically every Christian goes through these low points (and if you are a Christian and you don’t, then you are truly, truly blessed).

It hit  me today though:

I am constantly failing in my relationship with Christ.  Yet He’s been here, consistently, just waiting for me to come home to Him.  He has not wandered, or grown tired of waiting.  Who else does this for me?

There is not a human on this earth who has loved me as unconditionally as my God.  People are impatient and conditional.  People get frustrated.  People leave.

 God doesn’t.

 This is the most simple thing to understand.  I’ve heard it a million times over.  I have talked about it, read about it, seen it, experienced it . . .and it only just hit me today that God has loved me every single day of my life, even though I haven’t always been loving him back.

Imagine a human giving all of that love to you.  Wouldn’t it be fairly easy to return their affections?  Wouldn’t you want to at least spend a little bit of time with them every day to let them know you appreciate everything they do for you?  Why is it so much different with God?  Of ANYONE, He should be the easiest of all to give every bit of our love and time and affections to.  He created us, lived with us, died for us, and saved us.  He loves us, takes care of us, provides for us, comforts us, and listens to us, unconditionally.  No questions asked.

I don’t want to be in this rut anymore.  I am choosing not to be in this rut anymore, regardless of how I “feel” today, tomorrow, or whenever.  If you don’t mind me asking, anyone who might be reading this, I would appreciate prayers.  Satan hates. hates. hates. when we want to go against our trials and become more intimate with Jesus.  I’ll make it a priority to pray for those that are in a rut, too, cause God deserves our full, unwavering attention, doesn’t He?


“if i flee from greenest pastures/would you leave to look for me/forfeit glory to come after/’til i only dwell in thee./if my heart has one ambition/if my soul one goal to seek/this my solitary vision/’til i only dwell in thee/that i only dwell in thee.”

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