I used to laugh a lot. Just the other day, someone told me that I look sad, and I thought ‘wow. what a difference…’ And my loss of joy isn’t because of circumstance; I have nothing to be upset about, really. I have a great life. My loss of joy is because I’m looking for joy in the wrong places. The things I’m looking at to find joy can bring me happiness, but not actual joy.
Joy comes from God. It’s found in Him; it’s found from praising Him, studying Him, loving Him. I haven’t been doing that like I should lately. I’ve been letting work and projects and chores get in the way of my God. And when I step back and think about that, it makes me a sick to my stomach because how could I POSSIBLY want work more than God, the One who created this freaking world, and everything in it and outside of it, AND He loves me more than all of that. Seriously, what am I thinking?! I’ll spend all of this time on things that don’t even matter, and then I’ll read my Bible for about three seconds and somehow I let myself think that’s good enough?
Well, come to find out, it’s not good enough, because all it’s brought me is a lot of days spent feeling empty and sorry for myself because I know there’s more joy to be found in life than cleaning office buildings (Yes. I am a janitor.) or reorganizing my room every four days. Philippians 4:4 tells us to ‘rejoice in the Lord always.’ Not just sometimes, like when we feel like it.
So that’s my challenge for myself (and for you if you like taking challenges!). I’m going to spend more time finding joy in my Father, and less time trying to find joy in overworking myself. I mean, when I think about it, it should really be a pretty easy challenge.