I’ve spent a lot of time putting things off. Not just every day things like cleaning or laundry . . . you know, simple things like that. I put off the serious stuff. Stuff like becoming this independent person that everyone else seems to know how to be. Sure, I can take care of myself. I know the basics of survival. But there are a lot of things I never let myself learn. Like, what kind of person am I going to be? What exactly am I going to do with my life?
I have no idea.
Sorry, is this a little heavy for a first blog? I’m okay with it if you are.
Anyway. It’s these simple questions that I’ve been asking myself lately, and the truth is, I think I’ve been putting them off not because I don’t want to know the answers. The reason is actually a little pathetic, really. I put them off because of how cliche they are. The questions annoy me because it’s what people are constantly asking.
You know that relative that always asks the same questions every single time they talk to you? I mean, this is the same thing except it’s not just a relative, it’s EVERYONE that’s asking this question. So instead of thinking of a real answer, it’s easier to just make one up really fast, right? Of course. And even worse, you don’t want to become the person that asks the annoying questions; hence the reason I don’t ask them of myself. So instead, I put it off . . . until now.
It’s time to ask the questions. It’s time to figure it out and become an adult who knows what they want out of life. It’s time to ask myself the difficult questions I keep avoiding out of annoyance. But the nice thing is that, as a Christian, I can answer part of those questions . . . I’m God’s kid, and with this known fact, I’m supposed to go out and help other people see they are also God’s kids. Along the way, I’m going to learn a few more answers, not all of them, but enough of them. So I guess that’s kind of a purpose of this blog; I’m starting over with something fresh. There are no fake appearances, because I’m done giving fake answers, and everything else from here on will be the parts of myself that I’m discovering and choosing to share with the world. I’m not going to pretend to be a person that I’m not; I’m going to become the person that I am.